Thursday 29 September 2016

Another fake interview with no follow-on questions, generalization and no specifics.

I don't think William Pattison aka Eric Morse will ever learn. He has yet again had another interview, which just from the questions alone you can see that it isn't specifically for him.

I'm going to do something different this time. I am going to transcribe the interview completely, and interject in brackets where William has either lied, made a terrible mistake or is just plain being dumb. All of the interview isn't my work, so credit should be paid to the interviewer. All answers are those of William Pattison aka Eric Morse, and have not been altered for the purposes of this blog.

Name William Pattison (Also known as Eric Morse)

Age 52 (or you could say 30ish) (Why would anyone say 30ish when he is 52?)

Where are you from?
San Mateo, California

A little about your self `ie your education Family life etc
I’m a graduate of Aragon High School and did four years at The College of San Mateo studying Filmmaking and Business. (Did he graduate from College? He doesn't confirm or deny this. I'd be interested to know). It was at The College of San Mateo that I got my interest in writing (So he got his interest in writing at College. That is confirmed by him. Ok). My entry score (I’m lousy at tests) were low, so I couldn’t get into the fiction writing class. So, I bought a copy of the text book for the class (The Craft of Fiction by William C Knott) and taught myself how to write.(Really? You needed to be taught how to write? I'm no H.P Lovecraft, but I haven't read a single book on writing and manage quite well, winning numerous awards throughout my time at school. I find this incredibly unbelievable, and as you read on, you will see why).

I live with my sister and my niece in a four level Spanish style house. (Four level? Brittany Lynn Thompson told us it was three level. Are you just adding on levels to seem more important?)We inherited. I have three cats. One is a tubby American Shorthair named Balkazar Emperor of Evil, Child of Destruction. My next cat is a brain damaged (He somehow got in the clothes dryer) named Simply Tommy (Simply Tommy? Are you fucking serious? How offensive, calling a brain-damaged cat 'Simple'. An insight into William's mind reveals itself right there). My final cat is a paranoid grey tabby named Smokey. She is an outside cat but likes to take her meal in the kitty house I’ve provided on the porch of my house.


Fiona: Tell us your latest news?

Currently I’m trying to get three of my books republished because a bunch of cyber stalkers attacked my publisher’s Facebook and forced her to pull my books. (No one forced anyone to pull his books. Honestly, he was let go because he admitted to stealing a story from Jen and Sylvia Soska.This has been convered by me in the past, so I won't go into detail here, but he likes blaming others for his idiotic mistakes, that's for sure). I’m having to self publish the books now. I’m currently waiting while a friend reformats the books, it will take a while because she is having to do them around doing her other contracted formatting projects.
Also I’m drawing cover art for all my prologue stories for the ultimate combined edition of my six part anthology, Symphony of Death. These pictures will appear after the series finally finishes its run on Kindle. They, along with an additional bonus story, will appear in the combined print edition.
Also, besides doing my monthly podcast on Blog Talk Radio, The Wolf Pack Presents, I’m also trying my hand as a horror host on YouTube with William Pattison’s Bloodbath Theatre. On this show I present two classic horror films and give trivia on each.
So, keeping busy…

Fiona: When and why did you begin writing?
I’ve always had stories in my head it only when I got into college that I found a couple venues (Fiction writing and screen writing) to express myself. (So you only found venues for your writing in College, yet previously you state that you only got your interest in writing in College. Which one is it Mr Hypocrite?)
At the time I was going to film school it was before digital cameras and editing programs open door for fledgling filmmakers. Due to the cost of film and film processing along with having to depend so much on other people to put the stories on the screen I found myself moving away from the path of directing into screen writing. It was also around this time I became interested in writing books, because I realized that a lot of books end up being adapted for the screen, so if I did screen writing and writing books I opened more opportunity to get my stories out into the world.


Fiona: When did you first consider yourself a writer?
I was born a writer. (But.....But what about gaining your interest in writing at College? Yet you were born a writer? Seriously, M. Night Shayamalan couldn't write a story with this much confusion).I’ve had stories and scenes running through my mind since I was a little kid.  Now if you want to know when I considered myself an author, (You twat. An author and a writer are the same goddamn thing. Honestly!) that is an interesting tale….
It was 1993. I was working as an early morning stock person at our local Kmart. One of the ladies I worked with was a lady named Charisma Jones (Fake name). Charisma was a huge fan of science fiction and horror, like myself. We would spend hours while we stocked shelves talking about movies. One day Charisma told me that her relative (it was either her brother or cousin) worked for Berkley Books, a mainline publishing house and they had acquired the rights to do a series of book based on the Friday the 13th franchise. She said that her relative told her that they were looking for a writer to write the books. Supposedly she had brought me up to her relative and he told her to have me submit samples of my writing. I was reluctant because I was in the middle of writing my first novel, The Traveler: A Conflict of Interest, and had heard that the F13 franchise was pretty much dead due to the fact that the film Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday had come out and wasn’t received very well by the fans. This was before the Freddy VS Jason idea came out (No it wasn't. You see, at the end of Jason Goes to Hell, Freddy reaches up and snatches Jason's mask with his hand, planting the seed of a Freddy Vs Jason movie. You honestly have no idea about the franchise you claim to love so much do you, piggybacking on Friday the 13th you hack).. So the thing was if I wrote the books and they failed it might affect my book I was in the middle of writing. Also, I would be writing for a dying franchise, which wasn’t a positive thing as well. It took both Charisma and my mother pressuring me before I finally caved and submitted some of my writing to Berkley Books.
In the end I did get the job. I asked Berkley Books to credit my under the pen name Eric Morse, just in case the book series failed.
Well, the book series did indeed fail, but not because of my writing (It was because of your writing though. Where was Jason? Where were the graphic murders?). Berkley Books foolishly published the books as young adult horror, which kept the books from reaching Friday the 13th fans (So all Friday the 13th fans are adults? Now, the first Friday the 13th film came out in 1980. Jason goes to hell came out in 93, a whole thirteen years later) . Also, Berkley didn’t advertise or do book signings or have me at horror conventions to promote (Why would they? Who wants a Friday the 13th without Jason? Even the first film features him, yet your non-canon books don't. They are, like you, a complete joke). So, after nearly killing myself having to write four books in one year (That was another thing they hid in their contract),(Because writing books is difficult enough to cause death. Fucking asshole. Think of all the people who fight for our countries, the medical services, fire services before saying such a stupid thing) the book failed to sell in the volume Berkley expected and they cancelled the next four books in the series and only paid me $1,500 of the $10,000 I was supposed to get for all my work. That was my trial by fire as an author (You got a payment of around 8 percent. This doesn't make any sense. If you were supposed to get $10,000 for your work, you should have gotten $10,000 for it. The fact that you didn't is very strange indeed. Very strange.)


Fiona: What inspired you to write your first book?
Well, my first book, The Traveler: A Conflict of Interest, was actually inspired by the screenplay I wrote for my main film project I wrote in filmmaking class.
After I finished my class film the character of The Traveler kept coming to mind. I figured he had more stories, so I decided to do a series of books based on his exploits (Yet to this date there is only one book. Nice job of sticking to the plan William).


Fiona: Do you have a specific writing style?
You would have to ask my fans about that. From the feedback I get from fans my writing grabs them and plays out in their heads like a movie, except that they know and care about the characters more than a movie can (This is the most general answer anyone can give. Of course when you read it plays out in your head like a movie for fucks sake. That's what a person's imagination does). Also supposedly chapters build on each other so the reader get addicted to the story and have a hard time putting it down (I call Bullshit. I've read his work, and they are a mess of characters named after people he obsesses over or has known, and plot devices stolen from horror films or tv shows he watches).


Fiona: How did you come up with the title?
With my first book, The Traveler: A Conflict of Interest, I knew the name The Traveler had to be a part of the title. Then I came up with the subtitle, A Conflict of Interest because in the story The Traveler is conflicted in regard to his mission because the person he must stop is his best friend (Ok, so it's a conflict, but not a conflict of interest? Is his friend interested in something, but The Traveler is not? That's right William. Put words together and hope people don't think about things).


Fiona: Is there a message in your novel that you want readers to grasp?
For the answer to this question I will talk about my novel Psychotic State: The Novel (See how general the question is? So general that William Pattison aka Eric Morse gets to choose which book he talks about). Psychotic State is about a twenty-eight year old man who has been bullied and mistreated all his life. After a series of events causes the main character David Coleman to lose his job and his medical insurance. He is left off his meds for his bipolar condition. He finds his moral compass twisted and he starts hunting down the bullies who have made his life hell and takes revenge on them. It ends with him tricking a bunch of his torturers into coming to a field party where he slaughters them.
Psychotic State is a statement on the situation of bullying on both children and adults and shows an extreme example of what can happen when these situations are ignored. In the real world bullies are pushing people to murder and suicide because both people and law enforcement are more willing to ignore rather than help in these situations (Bullshit. This is a crutch you use to get people to feel sorry for you. Grow the fuck up).
An amusing side affect ('Effect', dumb-ass) I’ve heard about is that victims of bullying that read this book feel a relief of their pain (Bullshit. Reading a fucking book isn't going to help anyone who is bullied feel comfort from pain. If it is making people murder, or commit suicide, then obviously the bullying has a deep-seated psychological effect (not affect), so again you are simply making shit up. What a fucking idiot). It is like experiencing David taking his revenge frees them (My rosie-red ass it does).


Fiona: How much of the book is realistic and are experiences based on someone you know, or events in your own life?
All of my books are fictional and exist in a hyper reality. I may tap into my personal experience to enhance the perceived reality of the situation (or use the names of people you have obsessed over like Kathleen, Felicia etc). I know when I was writing Psychotic State I had to tap into my old buried experiences of being picked on and bullied as a child in school as well as taping (taping? You mean 'tapping' right? Was this interview even proof-read for fucks sake?) to my feelings of being a grown man and being harassed and mistreated by my peers in the horror community (Because you are a lying bullying piece of shit William. Face facts lardass).


Fiona: What books have most influenced your life most? a mentor?
In regards to books Siddhartha, The Razors Edge, To Serve Them all my Days, The Silent Flute, Moby Dick, A Tale Of Two Cities, The works of H P Lovecraft, The works of Edgar Allan Poe, The works of Ray Bradbury, The works of Clive Barker, The writings of Bentley Little, the writings of Issac Asimov, The writings of Harlan Ellison, The writings of H G Wells.
In regard to mentors, as in people who inspire me (people who inspire you are inspirations, not mentors. Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with this guy. His brain doesn't work properly, does it?), Harlan Ellson, Issac Asimov, Ray Bradbury,  H P Lovecraft, Clive Barker, David Cronenberg, Bentley Little, Gene Roddenberry, Dan Curtis, John Stanley.


Fiona: Are there any new authors that have grasped your interest and who is your favorite author and what is it that really strikes you about their work?
There are a couple newer authors that have my interest. One is Wayne Mallows. Wayne has written three wonderful vampire novels: Whitechapel Road, Mary, Mary Quite Contrary, and Unnatural Selection. The other author is Stephen King’s son, Joe Hill. Joe is the author of Horns, Heart Shaped Box, In Tall Grass, among others.
My current favorite author is Bentley Little. One thing I like about his work is each novel is unique and in its own world. One book I was royally impressed with was his novel The Store. This book is a vampire story without a vampire. It presents a retail big box store as a monster that sucks the life out of a small town.


Fiona: Name one entity that you feel supported you outside of family members.
My fans are my support. Even when my haters try to rip me down my fans are there to keep me going. It is the love of my fans that give me strength during my lowest times (Yet your fans exist in your head. They aren't real, just like your 'relationship' with Kathleen Wilhoite or your 'friendship' with Jen and Sylvia Soska).


Fiona: Do you see writing as a career?
It is more an obsession than a career. To me writing is life. I have to write. I must get out as many stories as I can before I die. Family and friends ask me why I continue since I don’t make much money off of it and it makes my life so complicated and frustrating due to the number of haters and cyber bullies I’ve amassed. For me I care more about leaving an enduring legacy over getting rich or being famous (his legacy will be 'William Pattison aka Eric Morse. Creator of arrid vaginas, imaginary relationships and hack writing).


Fiona: If you had to do it all over again, would you change anything in your latest book?
Not a thing. My latest book, which is still in the que (Spanish? Surely you mean Queue? No fucking proof-reading again! Amatures!) waiting to be formatted and published is exactly what I wanted to be, in fact even more. I’m excited to have it published and to hear what the fans have to say about it.


Fiona: Do you recall how your interest in writing originated?
It started with me reading wonderful books by wonderful writers (So not in College as you stated earlier? Wow. Three different versions in one fucking interview. Incredible that you can't even keep your story straight here). That planted the seed and got my imagination running and characters were born in my mind that demanded life. I think of authors as gods in their own way. They create worlds and everything in those worlds and if they does their job right their worlds come alive.
That is my vision of God. He is a writer named Chuck (Have you ever heard anything so idiotically pretentious as a writer declaring themselves as god? Fucking pathetic, and a measure of this imbeciles ego to boot).


Fiona: Can you share a little of your current work with us?
I’m currently in the middle of writing a six part horror anthology series titled Symphony of Death. The anthology will consist of six prologues that relate to the wrap around story and six main stories.
I’m currently working on the forth book in the anthology. The prologue in this book is titled Executive Assistance. It tells the story of Levy Jackson, the executive assistant of record mogal Vince Manfrenini (No, this doesn't sound like Friday the 13th composer Harry Manfredini at all. Way to go William's imagination). In the story Levy must watch helplessly as his boss slowly goes insane after he acquires the cursed sheet music of the Symphony of Death.
The main story of this part of the anthology is a story titled Shadowman VS The Undead. It tells the story of a former famous internet geek icon named Felicia Donovan (Felicia D, like Felicia Day?). It is the fifth year of the zombie apocalypse and Felicia is insane and living in a fantasy world where she is in the forth season of a reality show about how to survive the zombie apocalypse (Yet again William passes off the idea of Hellevator as his own. What a cunt). It is during one of her “demonstrations” of how to scavenge food that she is brought back to reality amusingly by a real life superhero called The Shadow Man. The Shadow Man saves her from a stampede (really? A stampede? shit shit shit!) of zombies. Then he takes her under his wing as his apprentice. It is then that the two of them must face a death cult that calls themselves The Undead. Their leader, who is named Hope, plans to kill all living humans and bring forth a world of the dead with himself as the head of its god totem. Now can a battle worn fifty year old real life super hero (Ooooo the same age as William. Coincidence?) and a geek girl (Like Felicia Day) stop an army nut case death cult members and their pet zombies?
Sound intriguing? (No it fucking doesn't. It sounds like a mastubatory fantasy you have imagined about Felicia Day, where you 'Rescue' her from Zombies and get laid because of it, you sad pathetic old man).


Fiona: Is there anything you find particularly challenging in your writing?
Filling an empty pages with black markings. All of writing is a challenge and a gamble. You might think you have the next great American novel only to find the rest of the world thinks it’s a dud (The whole world thinks this William. Accept it. It's the truth).


Fiona: Do you have to travel much concerning your book(s)?
I’ve traveled to Dayton Ohio in 2014 to be a guest and sign my books at a horror convention. I also did a convention in Rocky Mount Virginia to do a convention (Did a convention to do a convention? I'm confused!!). But those are all I’ve done since I signed with my last publisher. Before that I was a guest at the first Days of the Dead convention in 2011 in Indianapolis, but I didn’t have books to sign then because my Camp Crystal Lake novels were out of print. Currently I have no plans to travel, because I have to wait for my books to be republished.



Fiona: Who designed the covers?

With the Camp Crystal Lake novels Berkley books designed the covers, which I get a lot of flack about from my haters (Because they depict scenes that don't happen in the book. Think McFly, Think!!). Now I have full control over the covers of my books. I designed the cover for Psychotic State: The Novel. My publisher with Linkville Press designed the cover for The Traveler: A Conflict of Interest, but I had final ok on it. For Symphony of Death I design the basic cover background and letter graphic, but artist Christopher James Benavides does the actual artwork.


Fiona: What was the hardest part of writing your book?
Finding the time to do any writing. I work a full time job and my sister is constantly wanting me to do things around the house. I’ll be in the middle of writing a scene and my phone will ring and I’ll have to stop to do something for my sister (How old is William again?? What the actual fuck?). Then it will take me time to reconnect to the characters and story.


Fiona: Did you learn anything from writing your book and what was it?
Every book is a learning experience. You always learn something about yourself and the world around you. I’ve seen and experienced the best and worst of people. I’ve delved into the dark pits of my very soul (he calls his underwear 'His soul'). I’ve made friends and enemies. Writing is more than writing, it is life leather bound.

Fiona: If any of your books was made into a film who would you like to play the lead?
Hard to say. I know the studio would more than likely cast the wrong person. I would hate to see them pull on me what they’ve done with Stephen King and The Dark Tower film they are doing. I would hope they would look at the material and do it justice and show it respect (I don't think filming a steaming pile of shit for 90 minutes would be something anyone could enjoy).


Fiona: Do you have any advice for other writers?
If you are looking to be the next Stephen King, give up. You will be disappointed. Be prepared to work your ass off for little return. Be prepared to have lots of headaches and have loved ones get frustrated with you because you have little time to spend with them. Be prepared to have narrow minded idiots insult your hard work and try to beat you down and make you quit. But also be prepared to feel the love of a few souls that will think of you as something special. Also, be ready to have people ask you to help them get what you’ve got. But also remember you are GOD (No you are not god under any circumstances. Not only is this quite blasphemous, it is also, as previously mentioned, incredibly pretentious. You are an asshole of the highest order). You create reality in your books. You create worlds and people you will be closer to than anyone in “the real world.” (How full of shit can one man be?)



Fiona: Do you have anything specific that you want to say to your readers?

I love you. (What? You don't even know me.... Now I know how Kathleen, Bunny, Felicia, Black Friday and The Soska's felt about you).


Fiona: What book are you reading now?
Unfortunately, with all the writing I’m doing I have no time to read. I mostly listen to audio books on the bus home from work. The last book I listened to was Joe Hill’s Heart Shaped Box.


Fiona: Do you remember the first book you read?
No. That was too many years ago.  Can you remember any details from 30 years ago? (Yes. Can't you?) How about 20? What color shirt were you wearing on June 27th 2016? (Black. It's a simple question) What did you read in the newspaper on that day? (I didn't read a fucking newspaper. They are the only thing more contemptable than your feeble attempts at fan fiction) Modern day to day culture and everyday events cloud our memories of the past (Bullshit).


Fiona: What makes you laugh/cry?
Comedy and tragedy.(Also looking in the mirror, finishing a footlong and knowing no one likes his stories).


Fiona: Is there one person past or present you would meet and why?
Vincent Van Gogh. I would like to meet him a few months before he died and tell him how much is art meant to the world. Van Gogh died thinking his life’s work was garbage, not worthy of the price of a cup of coffee. It is stories like this that anger me. Too many artists die without getting the recognition or appreciation they deserve.


Fiona: What do you want written on your head stone and why ?
Here Lies William Pattison, Maker Of Worlds (And creator of the arrid vagina)
I want this because it is the truth. But it isn't. Not by any stretch of the imagination.


Fiona: Other than writing do you have any hobbies ?
I collect movies and movie memorabilia, I also paint and draw.


Fiona: What TV shows/films do you enjoy watching?
Anything horror, science fiction, fantasy, comedy, or mystery. (So pretty much everything and anything then?)


Fiona: Favorite foods / Colors/ Music
I’m addicted to hamburgers, Chinese, and Italian food (You could never tell).
Colors: Blue and red.
Good music. I hate Country and Polka.


Fiona: If you were not a writer what else would you like to have done?
Nothing else. (He can't even be a writer well).

I think that's enough of that. Be sure to share this and keep spreading the word about this monstrous cry-baby man-child who provokes, bullies and blocks.


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