It seems my mentor is posting once more. But it also seems he still hasn't learned to differentiate between truth and fiction, as he continues to 'create' his own adventures every time he leaves the house.
Let's begin by looking at this photo of good ole Willy Shitpants at the Martinsville Horrorfest.
Look how he is all alone, and even has time to acknowledge the photographer (he is obviously looking straight at the person taking the photo).
Things got interesting earlier today when Mr FecalTrow posted the following on his facebook.
'Ok, here is the final total on my sales at Martinsville Horrorfest. I sold 35 copies out of the 42 copies of Psychotic State I brought: I gave 4 copies out to people for free.. I sold 10 out of the 15 copies of The Traveler: A Conflict of Interest. I also sold 100 autographed 8X10 postcards and handed out 24 free 5X7 pictures I had with me. Finally, I gave out 150 autographed Robert Diablo book marks. So I think I did very well. The majority of the sales were on Saturday which was our busiest day of the convention. Also, I signed 11 complete sets and four individual books of the Camp Crystal Lake Novels. So, not bad, not bad at all'.
Now, I'm going to keep this simple. The numbers are far too rounded to be actual stats of his sales. He gave away 150 autographed bookmarks? But he mentioned previously that these bookmarks would be sold for $1 when people bought his 8 X 10 postcards, of which 100 were sold (at ten dollars each). So he's made $1100 already through that alone. 35 copies of Psychotic State: The Novel would have made him $350, while selling ten copies of his Traveler (notice how Traveller isn't spelt correctly) book would have made him another $100 or thereabouts (on the assumption he was selling his books for ten dollars a pop). So as a total, he made something around the region of $1550. I find it strange that all the numbers he gives are quite round. There is a pattern to them (which is very very strange indeed).
As previously mentioned, look at his table. He's alone. All by himself.
He was situated in the corner, by the kitchen. I assume this was so he didn't get angry for not getting any visitors. They subdued him with Subways. Footlongs of course.
I wonder where he kept these 42 copies of Psychotic State and 15 copies of The Traveler (correct spelling: The Traveller).
Of course, I am more than happy to be corrected by anyone who attended Martinsville Horrorfest and are willing to put me right. But there is one more little inconsistency that doesn't sit right with me.
William is always going on about how the Camp Crystal Lake novels are rare and out of print. So, what are the chances of people turning up at the rear end of nowhere turning up with eleven sets (that's 44 books) and another four individual books just for him to sign? It really does not add up (much like the majority of things surrounding William Pattison).
Amazingly, Brittany Lyn Thompson did not make an appearence while William was away at the convention (imagine how surprised we were: Not at all).
There isn't a thing Pattison can do about this. He is being investigated by Blog-Talk Radio for giving out callers phone numbers to one of the people who used to present a wolf pack (it's supposed to be one word, but Pattison, being the amazing author he is types it as two words) who then got his wife to call and impersonate Brittany Lyn Thompson. So he will be penalized and he might even lose his radio show altogether (and we haven't even gone into the copyright infringement with the full songs he plays before his show, or his mysogynistic and homophobic behaviour and rants (all of which have been pointed out to Blog-Talk Radio).
You wanted this fight Pattison. You kept calling people out who did nothing to you. You lied about people you had no business lying about. We will continue disproving your constant lies, as well as keeping the William Morse AKA Eric Patterson parody page up and running, because there isn't a damn thing you can do about that either.
So, anyways, keep America strong, watch horror films, drink your gravy and eat your Subways! Mine's a footlong!
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